Trash talk
AMSTERDAM - Long before the ‘plastic soup’, the huge floating rubbish dump in the Pacific, hit the headlines, I had an odd fascination with litter. As a kid, while my friends were doing sponsored walks to raise money for charity, I was doing sponsored litter picks. On a three-kilometre stretch of road near my house, I could fill 10 bin bags with refuse that passing motorists had thrown out of their windows.
Paint like poo
AMSTERDAM - The earth’s natural resources are running out but more and more people are cutting the crap and changing their lifestyles to do their bit for the planet. In order to ‘walk the talk’ I’m trying to do my part, one step at a time. This week: paint like poo!
Charles
We have a cleaner. His name is Charles. Charles is a man of few words. When he picks up the phone all he mumbles is: “Charles”. At first I can never figure out who’s calling me. “Who’s there?” I say. He responds with more mumbling, until eventually he screams his name out of pure frustration:
Trenchcoat with a story
AMSTERDAM – Eco friendly clothes are a tough one. They’re either extremely expensive or affordable but with helpless looking seals or “I love hemp” scrawled over them. Shame. Luckily you can buy clothes with a clear conscience if you love second hand or vintage. Vintage sounds less ordinary. She who keeps stuff long enough has gold in her hands, because
Ecotainment
AMSTERDAM – Of course it’s just a word and I think it’s meant well. But what a joke: the most pathetic word of 2008, ecotainment. What is ecotainment? A circus with local animals? Second hand jokes? ‘The Big Recycle Show’? I’m curious. Of course all eco initiatives are worth a cheer, and you shouldn’t judge something by its title. But it’s very hard this time.
Cucumbers wear condoms
AMSTERDAM – Everybody has a cabinet stuffed with plastic bags. It’s a typical case of half measures. Tossing away a plastic bag immediately doesn’t feel good. That’s why we postpone it until a mound of plastic attacks you when opening the kitchen cabinet. So starts my guilt trip.
Fat people on mopeds
AMSTERDAM – Around all of us there is a thin layer of civility. It’s a bit of a shock when this layer disintegrates in front of your eyes. Out of nowhere you can be confronted with a ranting road user or elbowed on the train. The problem is that no one admits to their own lack of civility. Instead, we prefer to cast horrified looks at our unadjusted compatriots. In my experience, we tend to show our more primitive side when we’re abroad.
Organic treasures in a cheerless ‘lucky dip supermarket’
AMSTERDAM - The more you earn, the more nonchalantly you buy stuff. Well, at least I do. That’s why I’ll never be rich. People with that talent are the ones who spot pennies on the street and calculate to the last decimal what percentage of tip they leave in a restaurant.
